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Oil Spill: "Hot-gushing, butt-cramping, gut-hosing"

Dallas Boyd
Dallas Boyd

The latest oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico makes you sick, right? 

Since April 20th (that's almost a month ago at the time of this writing) many experts believe that more than 10x the “official figure” of 5,000 barrels a day (or 210,000 gallons) is pumping into the ocean. 
That delicate word, “spill” strikes me as an interesting euphemism in this situation. I would like to cut the crap and describe this disaster as it is and luckily for me (as I’m feeling uninspired this week) the profound words of somebody else echo in my mind… “hot-gushing, butt-cramping, gut-hosing.” 
Although Chuck Palahnuik was referring to an intense orgasm when he wrote this, I believe the shoe fits. When you are trying to suck as much as you can out of something, what the hell did those “drill baby, drill” clowns expect?
Yet this blatant waste of resources and immeasurable environmental harm only alarms us into outrage, disgust and finger pointing because it has - literally - risen to the surface where it cannot be ignored. Otherwise I am sure we would be more than happy to do so, as we ignore so many other problems (like the floating plastic debris in the ocean that covers a fourth of the planet's surface area and continuously leaches poison - opps!).
Look deeper and you will see a chronic pattern of human stupidity and greed, which has arisen in history time and time again, under different circumstances. Like the death of Princess Diana. The masses (i.e. me and you too) fed the media who hounded her and we made them rich. As the pressure on our precious princess reached its violent climax, we were angry and sad and cast blame upon the very entity which worked so tirelessly to provide us with so many invasive - and juicy - holiday snaps of Lady Di sunbathing or skiing. It wasn’t our fault. We needed to see what she was up to. It was those god dam careless paparazzi. Or more likely… an evil conspiracy. 
And here we are now, chained to the oil industry like babies to the tit, but as the delivery sours we turn on the source like angry uneducated villagers with fire and pitchforks. Talk about biting the hand that feeds it. Now the complaints and criticisms fly because untested chemicals are being used to try and break up the oil. “We are very disappointed in their (BP and the Environmental Protection Agency’s) approach” said Robert Barham, Secretary of the Department of Wildlife and Fisheries. Really? You mean human consumption of oil developed faster than environmental technologies designed to control possible negative consequences? Outrageous! 
Perhaps it is not the fault of society. After all, we place our trust in the suppliers of what we consume. We, as individuals, have no choice or power. Those who have been made filthy rich by creating out needs must owe us something right? Some form of security or safety? Filthy rich people are almost always philanthropic, selflessly working to defend the greater good... Right? 
Alternatively... "The Power is Yours!" - Captain Planet.
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