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Adult Toy Megastore's warehouse broken into by elves

Contributor:
Fuseworks Media
Fuseworks Media

Adulttoymegastore’s Warehouse in Grenada North suffered a serious break-in over the weekend.

CCTV footage from the adult toy retailer’s 3,500 square metre premise caught the offenders but employees couldn’t catch them as they raced toward the CBD.

Adulttoymegastore Chief Exsexutive Officer Jo King say the burglars stole thousands of vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, clitoral stimulators, blindfolds, dolls, masturbators, whips, anal beads, ben wa balls, floggers, rabbits, vibrating panties, penis enlargers, lingerie, cockrings, glass toys, and costumes.

"They even took our mascot Moby - he’s a 20ft dildo," Ms King sobbed.

"They took everything and they left a note saying they’re going to give it away because we’ve been too good."

The ransom note says the robbers will be distributing toys across the capital throughout December.

It was signed by Rudi and Effy, known to be two elves cast out by Ms Clause for stealing her Satisfyer Pro 2.0.

Santa Clause commented from the North Pole that he’s sorry security was so poor.

"I’m not happy about it either. I only come once a year, so Ms Claus loves her Satisfyer Pro. I had to kick them out. But they took off with my list so they know where all the bad girls and boys are."

Wellingtonians are told to keep an eye out for two frisky elves carrying a big sack.

"It might be buzzing, they took a lot of vibrators," Ms King says.

Adulttoymegastore’s Head of Customer Satisfaction Sophie McGrath says the team will keep hunting the elves. "Each time we spot them we’ll update our Facebook page to let the public know. Then they can go and try to capture the elves who may just bribe them with toys and gear from Adulttoymegastore. Just join the daily events on our page."

"Stay vigilant and don’t be fooled by their big candy canes."

For a tour of the warehouse or if you have any questions contact emily@adulttoymegastore.co.nz

Adulttoymegastore is based in Wellington, New Zealand. We ship world-wide.

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