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Guys Can Do No Right In Relationships

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Contributor:
Paul Taylor
Paul Taylor

In this era of infotainment and advertorials, lifestyle bloggers and writers just loving telling us all about our own relationships. 'How to tell if their cheating', 'Sex tips he'll love', 'What you eat together says about your relationship' and 'Borrowing his shoes sets back feminism fifty years'. Sure, some I just made up but keep an eye out coz pretty soon those desperate lifestyle writers will dig themselves down to the bottom of the barrel and have nothing left to write about.

Ahem. Relationships are tough, after the honeymoon period you and your partner get into the swing of relationship life, but relationship life gets interrupted by relationship fights. The large amounts of time together lose their vibrancy as the fun starts to dry up and is replaced by showers of annoyance and nit picking, “why didn't you do it the way I told you?”, “why couldn't you just explain it simpler?” We all know what its like.
For us guys, when a woman is pissed off we have no idea what to do, especially if we don't know what they are annoyed about in the first place. Do we keep acting like nothing is wrong and attempt conversation that way? No, because you'll make her angrier. Do we give her a hug and not feel the familiar warmth but instead electricity and hate emanate from their pores? Do we, in turn, attempt the silent treatment and avoid her at all costs? No, because that makes it worse. Do we head to the pub or a mate's place and let it blow over in our absence? No, because we're seen as running from the problem, when, after all else considered, handling the problem isn't going to fix it either. 

Then there's the flowers and the apologies, which, no matter when said or given, always seems too insincere or too late or just makes the woman angrier, so we return to square one. When the fight is over we can look into her eyes and that sparkle returns and we know all is well, until she decides to be shirty at something else.

Us guys can't really crack it at our partners because they get angry and then we're at square one yet again, and have to attempt the above remedies. Then there's her excuses; “I had a crappy day at work”, “I'm PMSing”, “You neglected to (insert trivial task here)” and so on and so forth. Guys can do no right in a relationship, there will always be something that gets her ticked off and we just have to take it or leave her, find another woman then put up with it all again, maybe worse but maybe not. As they say, the devil you know is better than the devil you don't.

So, the only real way to avoid the showers of annoyance is to always take the all blame and treat her like a princess. Yeah right, and here are my balls in a doggy bag for you, too. No, the annoyance is inevitable. The trick is to understanding why it comes and goes. 

Women like to feel in control so they use their emotions to control what they see as precious to the both of you, the relationship, and they use negativity to get a visible adverse reaction from you, the guy. They continue to control when she decides the fight is over and again can see a reaction. I would suggest that the trick is to not care but that would become obvious in times of friction, so, don't care and don't show it. This way, when a fight does begin, just think to yourself it'll be over soon and while it is happening try to think about something that actually is precious to you, perhaps your computer, your car, your mistress or your job and pretend you're losing one of those things so the expression on your face kinda matches the situation your in. Just remember, she will always come back like a well thrown boomerang because, let's face it, she can't be mad at you forever. 

So there you have it. The morale of the story is to give her a sense of control every now and then because then she won't need to pick fights to take her control trip. Relationship advice is so much easier to give than to take, maybe now I understand why so many people write this stuff. Next week: What Her Many Hair Styles Say About Her Many Personalities & Which Ones To Look Out For.

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