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Let's All Be A Hero

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Paul Taylor
Paul Taylor

The term 'hero' is currently sitting in that grey part of the vernacular, used too loosely it's lost its true meaning, but used too selectively it could apply to anyone who has done something a tad beyond the norm, but not exceptional.

I'm thinking of the 'hero' who landed a plane in the Hudson river. I think lucky is more appropriate. Thus begins my tirade to hastily take 'hero' from its current use to a slang use. Here are some examples of my heroism written in the style they so sorely deserve, front-page news!

Disposable Damaged Hero

A local young man has been herald as a hero by a local waste management employee after he witnessed the young man separating recyclables from waste.

After partying the night before, the young man, who was hung over at the time, had accidentally left the recyclables in a plastic bag then placed the plastic bag in the recycling bin. 

Instead of sleeping through his hang over, the young man awoke early to rectify the situation.

“As I drove up in my truck to collect his bin, you could tell he was in pain. His face was pale and eyes bloodshot as he worked to separate the waste.” said waste management employee Mr Frank Carson.

“He saw me coming and gave a weak wave. He really did well to have the job done so early as I started work earlier than usual that particular morning.” Carson said.

When questioned on his heroics, the local young man, who wished to remain anonymous, had little to say.

“I just wanted to do the right thing by everyone involved. I knew I had made a mistake but I'm happy I had the time to fix it, thus fixing the earth in my own special way.” said the young man.

A ceremony for the anonymous hero will be held this Friday. 

And there's this thing that happened a while back…

Batteries For A Sanitarium

A donation supported mental health clinic got more than it bargained for when it put out a call in the local free paper for readers to donate unwanted mobile phone batteries.

Avid reader of the paper Paul Taylor has been dubbed a hero by the head of the mental health clinic, Mrs Heather Gronovich, with his donation of three mobile phone batteries.

“We received four batteries in total, which is a lot more than we ever dared dream.” Mrs Gronovich said.

“This good looking young man alone supplied us with seventy-five percent of the total haul. He is truly a hero.” she said.

“I mainly use Nokia's and I had a pretty old Nokia, a real old Motorola and an even older Sony Ericsson in a drawer doing nothing, so I thought I'd unload 'em and help out people at the same time' Mr Taylor said.

The mental health clinic has been trying to find old batteries to fit into the old handsets for a while now but hasn't had any luck.

“We called the manufacturers of the phones and explained our situation here at the clinic and asked if they could donate some batteries, but all we got was the cold shoulder.” Mrs Gronovich said.

The patients at the clinic use the mobile phones on a pre-paid basis to call family and friends when they feel lonely which helps keep them feel less isolated and it helps with their recovery.

“Two of Paul's batteries don't fit the phones we have and the third that does fit is damaged, but it doesn't take away from his heroism.” she said.

A ceremony for Mr Taylor will be held this Friday. 

What have been your heroic moments?

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