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Tuna Nearing Extinction

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Dallas Boyd
Dallas Boyd

Everybody knows that the best place to find a delicious juicy whale to eat is in Japan. My cousin, who is presently in Japan, helpfully informed me that yes, they are on the menu. Those heartless Japanese bastards!

Today I went whale watching in a beautiful part of the world called “Ballena,” where whales come every year to mate and raise their young in the warm tropical waters, before migrating back north. Ironically, the coast of Ballena is shaped exactly like a whale tail - a pretty magical place.

I spent about an hour watching a baby humpback whale playing in the ocean with it’s mother, flapping their big beautiful tails about and waving “hello” at us with their fins. We were all most excited and totally one with nature.

Everybody knows that you can find a delicious can of tuna to eat at your local supermarket. Tuna is fabulous, you can eat it on toast, or with pasta, or rice, or just about anything. And it’s good for you. I have never been tuna watching. I don’t know of any magical coastlines that are shaped like a tuna. Little baby tunas do not wave out to me. I love eating tuna. But I would never eat a whale. What’s the difference? Whales have a better publicist.

In 2006 National Geographic reported that Bluefin Tuna in the Mediterranean east Atlantic Ocean are nearing extinction due to overfishing. The WWF (not the World Wrestling Federation, the other WWF) ordered the fishing of them be stopped immediately. Not that anyone pays much attention. Those pesky Japanese catching all those whales. Now that`s a problem! (Or a smoke screen?)

This year, the WWF reported that the conservation and management measures currently in place are "highly unlikely" to restore yellowfin tuna populations to sustainable levels.

We are wiping out tuna. Big time. 

If Tuna is an endangered species why are we still chowing down the sushi and pointing fingers at the Japanese? What we are doing to tuna is exactly the same as what they are doing to the whales. The giant bluefin tuna is reportedly,  “too valuable everywhere to be allowed to live anywhere. For somebody who kills a bluefin tuna (which are listed as critically endangered), the giant bluefin tuna may be worth more money to a person who kills one than any other animal on the planet, elephants and rhinos included. A few years ago, a single 444-pound bluefin tuna sold wholesale in Japan for $173,600. One fish."

But you just don`t see those guys anymore. And the less you see them, the more they are worth. So the fishing heats up.

At any given moment in time there are millions of different battles taking place. How can you ever complain of boredom? Pick a cause. Save the Rainforest. Hugs not Drugs. Bring our Troops Home. Go Green. Gay Pride. We pick causes that are sexy or fashionable. And we only want to save cute and cuddly animals. Pandas, dolphins, monkeys and stuff. Tuna is not sexy or fashionable. Tuna is delicious.

You know what? Those whales weren`t waving cheerily to us dorks bobbing around in the boat. They were flipping us heartless bastards off.

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