19 NOV 2008 - Tuesday November 25, 2008, is International White Ribbon Day, a day dedicated to awareness of violence against women. Wearing a white ribbon is a personal and public pledge never to commit, condone or remain silent about violence against women.

As in previous years, many Auckland City Police Officers will be wearing the white ribbons throughout the week. Stalls will be set up around the District - including the CBD, Newmarket and St Lukes - where ribbons will be distributed to the public by volunteers from various agencies dedicated to stopping violence and by Police Officers who have volunteered their time to assist.

Women and children remain over-represented as victims in family violence homicides and reported family violence incidents, so Police Officers relate to the need to support the initiative and other violence reduction initiatives and campaigns. Look out for the stalls and, if asked, consider taking and wearing a ribbon to show your support.

Christmas build up November is a busy time for the Police with the lead up to Christmas. For many families it is not the happy occasion most of us are accustomed to.

While they're never acceptable excuses for violence, the added burdens of financial stress, strained family relationships and increased consumption of alcohol are often significant triggers for physical and psychological abuse and can have devastating effects in many families.

Based on years of experience, we are anticipating our frontline staff and many of our investigative units will be required to respond to about 400 reported family violence incidents over the "festive" month.

About 100 people will face arrest and prosecution, many for serious offending and many, many children will be affected by witnessing these incidents. The Police are ready to respond to the expected increase in family violence incidents in the coming months, however we would like to see individuals and families take some early action to secure the safety of 'your families' Too often we hear in tragic cases that family members, neighbours and other people - including work colleagues - were aware of ongoing violent relationships yet the tragedy of death was not averted.

Police concede that family violence dynamics are often complex and require specialist intervention, however there is plenty of help and free advice available and much of it is only a phone call away. Family Violence is not OK, but it is OK to ask for help. Tips for a calm and happy holiday season * Set aside money to cover bills that arrive in January and February.

* Moderate drinking - you don't need to drink to excess to enjoy life.

* Take time out - if things become heated or stressful, go somewhere for a few hours to let feelings and emotions calm down.

* If you are feeling afraid or overwhelmed, talk to someone you trust.

* Don't sweat over the small stuff - minor problems can be resolved without arguments.

* If you share custody of children, come to an agreement so that the children get to spend time with each of you. * Most importantly - if you have any fears for your own or your children's safety, contact the Police immediately.

Family violence - it's OK to ask for help

A number of organisations are ready to help with family violence issues: * If it's happening now, call 111. Otherwise, contact the following organisations for guidance, support or refuge:

* Women's Refuge 0800 REFUGE (0800 733843) 24 hours.

* Preventing Violence in the Home 0508 DV HELP (0508 384 357) 24 hours.

* It's Not OK! Family Violence Information helpline (0800 456 450) available from 9am to 11pm. * Visit www.areyouok.org.nz - which has lots of information and helpful advice on family violence. It is the website of a campaign against such violence.

* Contact your local Citizens Advice Bureau for information about other services such as drug and alcohol abuse, gambling problems and budgeting services.